Til my broken soul gets well
Angled like a tree branch, both bones in my five year old’s arm were grotesquely distorted. An x-ray wasn’t necessary to diagnose the fracture and her daddy said, “This ortho stuff; it ain’t hard.” Tears dried on her cheeks and her lip quivered as she fought a battle for composure. That is until…..
When the IV catheter punctured her unblemished skin, she howled unconsolably. Though it was years ago, my recurring helplessness to take away her pain is fresh in my mind. Now track marks over my own veins tell the story of chronic illness. Every 21 days, a plastic catheter is threaded into a vessel in my arm through a metal cylinder and really, it doesn’t hurt that bad.
Surely broken bones are worth more tears…
The pain from the break was accidental but that tubing sticking out of her arm, well it seemed optional. So she protested, loudly. I get it. Life happens and it’s painful. People get sick, have accidents and die. Pain is a ubiquitous part of life.
But optional pain is excruciating.
Make it stop
I can’t take anymore
My soul hurts
Proverbs 18:14, “A man’s spirit can endure sickness, but who can survive a broken spirit?” HCSB
Do they make casts for the soul?
Surely broken hearts are worth even more tears…
A rainbow-colored cast covered layers of cottony cloth which immobilized her arm for 6 weeks while the bones fused. Not only did it protect her from pain, it promoted healing.Sometimes we have to be still in order to heal #broken Click To Tweet
Can somebody wrap me and hold me still for a while?
’til my broken soul gets well?
Psalm 119:80, “Oh, love me – and right now! – hold me tight!” MSG
Dust particles sprayed the room as an assembly line of saw blades ground through fiberglass in the pediatric orthopedic clinic. The wide-eyed collection of kids awaited reuniting with their own flesh and healed bones. No one prepared me for sight of my child’s arm when she exited the room. Her bones sagged in the cast and instead of fusing in a straight line, her lower arm was shaped like a comma.
My life is punctuated by a comma too. I don’t know how the sentence ends, but I sure hate how it begins.
Proverbs 3:6, “In all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” NIV
NEVER THE SAME
As she grew, her arm eventually straightened out, but not completely. You wouldn’t notice the palpable callous left from the swing set fall but if you rub it just so, it’s a little tender and you can feel the forever reminder.
I suspect the wound of my soul will be the same.
Psalm 143:11, “Revive me, O Lord, for Your name’s sake! For Your righteousness’ sake bring my soul out of trouble.” NKJV
God will place the hot iron of His molding grace on the wrinkles of our souls when He needs to. He does this because we have been created in His image and He desires that we reflect Him well. He will allow the fire of testing to bring steam to our hearts
. ~Tony Evans, Detours (www.DetourBook.com)
Still isn’t easy
Optional pain immobilized me for a while. Action is my default mode, but every time I moved the broken places, I winced. Stillness is a class I fail repeatedly and keep retaking, on the other hand permanent immobility eventually paralyzes. Thank God His mercies are new every morning. He is in the business of restoration!
Psalm 31:7, “I will rejoice and be glad in your steadfast love, because you have seen my affliction; you have known the distress of my soul.” ESV
Heartbreak leaves us permanently disfigured even when it’s invisible. Go ahead, rub it and feel the sensitive scar. Then never forget, what Satan intends for harm, God uses for good. He promised and although He allows commas in our past, breaks in our lives and fractures in our hearts, He always keeps His promises. He is forever faithful. A season of immobility is necessary for healing, but don’t stay there. Redeem your pain. by ministering to others. Now that I’m well, I can look you in the eye and tell you; I’ve been there and through God’s strength, I survived.
2 Corinthians 1:4, “He comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any kind of affliction, through the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” HCSB
What comma in your life can you use to minister to others? Why waste it? Redeem it.